A long-overdue follow up...

... to this post. First, I want to thank each and every one of you for your comments. There are some great ideas and thoughts in there, some of them that I never would have thought of on my own. I wanted to write all of you back independently, but email time is extremely limited these days. Please know I found comfort in many of your comments, a laugh in several, and much-needed support in others. Thank you.

Now that I've had time to reflect on it, and am a little less "raw" from the event, I'm happy with how I handled it.

The fact of the matter is, this was not a curious individual. He approached us with his nose crinkled, as though we smelled, and a look of dislike (disgust maybe?) on his face. Maybe he had a chip on his shoulder, or a predisposition not to like us. It was clear from the get-go that he was not out to make friends. In fact, as he was approaching us, my "mama-spidey-sense" went off and I felt like I was about to get bullied, and I kind of feel like I was. One approach would have been to immediately turn away (which never occurred to me at the time) the other was to give as good as I got. Maybe I was cranky, tired, or irritated to begin with, but for whatever reason... I didn't want to back down.

Another factor in all of this is that I was caught completely off-guard. I was in a high-end market, on my "turf" ... a place I felt nothing bad could ever happen. (Classic horror movie concept right there) I've had many a conversation started by people with the exact same concept. Usually they are nicer and say "Is your son originally from China/Viet Nam/Korea/Japan?" All of them until this point have turned into really nice conversations, some of which have been amazing. For example, this past winter, an older gentleman asked me if Spencer was from Korea. I recall that I was not really in the mood for it then either, but I was polite and said that he was. (He also phrased it the same —"Korea?!" — but had been engaging with Spencer prior, and said it nicely, so it wasn't nearly as offensive to me.) Well, lo and behold, this man was stationed there for years and began singing him a children's Korean songs. He asked if we traveled, made small talk, asked what we did in Seoul. Every time we see him now, he calls out "hello and annyong!" to us. That's just one example. This is what I'm used to. This had been my experience, and this was my "normal." Now it's a little altered, obviously. I know I will have many more experiences like this, but the first was a lot harder than I thought. (Ironically, I have had three more bad comments since. Go figure.) And everything, everything, we had learned in those pre-adoptive classes flew out the window when I was on the spot.

So in hindsight, could I have handled it better? Probably. Do I feel that I handled it well? I could have done better, but I'm not ashamed. At least I didn't ram him with my shopping cart, which was honestly my first thought... right?!

{Please do not feel as though you need to comment on this post. I posted it mostly because I needed closure on my end, but also to thank you all for your comments on the original post.}